ANOTHER GREAT COUGARS NITE

well another cougars nite down and many more to come. i have the most wonderful friends and they are such special people in my life. sometimes they annoy you and destroy you but most of the time they love you, support you, hold you and hug you.

for starters i wore a dress!!! OMG yes me wearing a dress. Me who is embarssed about my body and hates it sooo much that I hide it as much as possible. they main deciding factor to do it was that i watched a dvd of me with my god child from about 8yrs ago. there i was hiding in big baggy clothes that was disgusting and i was not that big. i could see my self shame of who i was and i said enough. i took a stand on fri nite and reclaimed me.

i am not saying this will be easy and i know that this will be a very hard fite but o i have fought back from sooo many other things in my life that i know i can finally loosen the chains that bind me and begin to fly.

it is a bit scarey that decision but oh the fun i am going to have whilst the journey is taking place.

so sat became girls day at my house. after a nanny nap for nikkers (2hrs) tish, carla and i set about doing the girlie makeup, hair and outfits and i must say i had fun.

then off to the presentation nite where i was greated with "F" ME you look hot, and "wow look at nikkers" and "she scrubs up well". i went with no expectations and had compliments all nite. then my blast ball babies came running up and hugged me and played with me and that was even more special. see these kids dont care what you look like just if you love them and care for them.

i had the greatest honour of presenting the medals to these babies for blastball and they were so proud of themselves and so were the parents. they were gorgoues and they will always have a medal. they may not remember what the played or how they played but at the age of three they can say i got a medal for a sport!!! how cute!!!

then party time with friends. fun and fun. jez got kicked out of the leauges but at least it wasnt for peeing over the balcony like the incident from last year. onto the goodies where my confidence was high that i actually looked men in the eye and said hello to strangers and smiled at people. instead of looking lost and frightened and worried and on guard, i relaxed and just went with the flow.

i felt confident in me. yes at the pub there was beautiful skinny people there but i am me and i am here. i just enjoyed myself.

the only thing that brought me down and destroyed my nite is that i woke up with a migraine. they seem to be back in force so it is either my neck and pillows or just a seasonal reaction to spring flowers. they started up in townsville and so far are controlable with asprin. hopefully they will stay that way.

time to go and do the routine sunday jobs. but i am enjoying these as they all are catherigic and relaxing for the brain to switch off and relax and just do. washing already done, crock pot lambs chop cass on, dishwasher on and a friend on the way for coffee. can you ask for a better life